22 November, 2009

I Love My Daughter...

But she's been driving me nuts lately! I'm so ready for this little stage to pass. Yes I do know that it will probably be followed by another one that may or may not be harder, but still... lol. No really, most of this is just little stuff that hasn't been going on very long & I don't expect will last... annoying and I've got to find a way to get her past it.... but at least one of them has turned in to a big issue.

Basically I've gotten to the point that we cannot go to the 11 AM Mass. We keep trying (and mostly failing) to go at 8AM because she behaves 239259294246 times better. You think I'm kidding or exaggerating? I'm not. And of course since Baba helps his aunt out directing the choir when she can't... there are weeks that we don't have a choice anyway and have to go at 11. I've tried everything I can think of too. We've tried sitting inside (like not in the cry room) and she does a little better, but can't make it through half the Mass before having a meltdown and I have to rush her out of there. I end up on pins and needles until that point knowing its gonna happen sooner or later, so I can't even concentrate. Staying in the cry room is not an option either... she throws fits, tries to hit this partition thing in there, etc. She likes playing with the kids, but after awhile she gets too rough or decides that one of their toys is hers or tries to steal their food. I've tried bringing toys she doesn't normally see, tried bringing her favourite toys, everything I can think of to distract her... but no. As soon as they come out they get tossed aside and pronounced yucky. AND THIS ONLY HAPPENS AT 11. I don't know if its just too close to her naptime still (it used to conflict and I know that caused some probs) or what, but I've started dreading the weeks we have to go to that particular Mass.

I prob wouldn't have mentioned it though if it weren't for last week. Normally a Mass I really look forward too, it was the one for Veterans Day. Baba was directing so we had to be there early. This made things so much worse. At first she was ok... He went in to rehearse and she started dancing and then tried to direct along with him. Too cute right? But then we moved over to the Church and as soon as we got in the cry room she started screaming. She threw her turtle across the room, ripped her shoes off, pulled at the door, hit the glass that we sit behind before I could stop her (and yes people heard, I saw them turn around), started kicking the wall... and all this was before anyone else came in there. I had the keys so I tried to get her shoes on so we could leave, but of course I couldn't catch her... and then people started coming in. Mass started and for a bit she calmed down a little. Saw a little boy she likes to terrorize (seriously she has a crush and he wants nothing to do with her lol) and followed him around awhile, not the best thing... but not destroying anything or screaming right? And then another friend came in and they started playing... until she tried to break her doll. At that point I managed to corner her & started to put on her shoes... and of course she started fighting me, screaming, kicking, biting... the last of which she almost never does. I can barely pick her up anymore, so I'm struggling to hold on to her... Finally got the damn shoes on & got her out of there... Now have I mentioned that we hadn't even made it past the first reading?

We literally sat in the truck the rest of the morning until the reception afterwards... Baba distracted her during that with iced tea, but once the ice ran out she started acting up in there too. Back outside... but he had the keys this time, so we just stood outside the doors. She did decide to be good once she heard the bagpipes (or puppies as she called them lol), but still. I missed almost the whole thing too. On the other hand, she ate great once the food came out. I can't complain about her eating... something I know I should be thankful for at her age.

But yeah... none of that happens if we go to one of the other Masses. Now that Baba's off weekends, maybe we'll try going Sat night since 8AM is proving to be so rough to do. Beyond that I have no clue what to do. Any suggestions would be welcome (short of bringing snacks... that's just not happening) esp because I know we're gonna have to go to this one again at least once a month. LOL - We would have today if I hadn't woke up with a stuffy nose & am afraid I might be coming down w/ what Kalila had the other day. Not about to risk giving it to the other kids. Ok, yes, partly making excuses... but even if I wasn't royally frustrated over the situation I still wouldn't go while sick lol.


Beyond that... She has decided that brushing teeth is yucky. Remember she used to love brushing them? Yeah... no more. I'll have this perfectly sweet little girl running around playing with me and just being great (ok, some days thats a huge exaggeration... but even when she is doing that...) and then bring out the toothbrush and all hell breaks loose. She screams, she cries, she runs from me. She doesn't listen when she's in that mood. The only upside to the whole mess is that she will literally put herself to bed to get away from it. Granted I don't want her to go to bed w/out brushing her teeth, but it is nice to have her put herself to bed lol.

I did figure out one way to make it a little easier the other night though. I had her seated on the sink to wash her hands and grabbed the toothbrush then. She fought a little, but I managed to get them somewhat clean.

She's also pulling that little attitude at night when she wants to nurse. If I tell her no (there were a couple nights this week I didn't say no because she was sick, was very grateful she has refused to wean at that point lol) she starts screaming and crying instead of going for the snuggling like she was before, and generally will do during the day if I can't or its been too soon after the last time (we've gotten down to like twice a day). Screams that snuggling is yucky. The other night Baba had it and put her back in her room... and as soon as he did, she starts screaming to snuggle. Finally had it with that (and feeling really bad about it because she sounded so sad) I opened her door and said to come on... and she says no, bed.. and put herself to bed! Last night that happened again (after she bit the crap out of me no less.. not on purpose, but still), but then she came back to our room after I was asleep and helped herself.. I had dreams all night about walking around nursing her, woke up to her still nursing and tried to end it because lets face it I can't do that at this point & another fit followed. Around the point that she hit me I decided to put her back in her room and then she screamed snuggle again, got out and refused to snuggle again... but at least stopped screaming. Refused anything else I offered her, including cereal... and then goes and asks Baba for cereal... lol.

Thankfully this doesn't happen everyday... or all day when it does... and part of me wonders if it has anything to do with her getting sick the other day. Esp since it got worse around the time she was. Hopefully now that she's feeling better she'll settle down a little... because I'm at a loss for what to do when she's like that. Nothing we've tried really works... and despite what some people think, I can't just pick her up and make her do something when she's refusing it. Like literally I can't. Baba can... but when he's not here?


Before I go... I do have to say that she has also been doing a ton of cute things lately. She's learned the word Christmas. She talks on the phone to us so much more now... even asks to talk to Baba while he's at work! She learned to say "I'm berry sorry Mumble" yesterday and then told me she was berry sorry this m0rning after one of her fits. Most of the time she has huge smiles on her face and is constantly telling us she loves us and stuff like that... tries to use it to get her way lol. She's also been parroting some not so pleasant words, so we've had several talks about "bad words" and she's started telling on us when she hears one of us say one. She's just been saying all kinds of new things, and most of them have us smiling. Right now she's sitting here "reading" a Curious George counting book lol.

I have a really big post coming a little later btw. Sorry for the 2 in one day thing, but we had a huge day yesterday that deserves a post of its own... I'll try to get it up this afternoon or something.


babyyahyah said...

Sounds like a typical 2 year old to me. Believe me my kids are no angels. I stopped taking Sofia to church for the whole summer since she was so bad there I started taking her back in November and she is better...well at least she doesn't talk there anymore. I have my own post to write about today's experience that I was just about to write before I read but its very Anyway, my boys were far worse than Kalila and Sofia combined at and again slowly over time they are acceptable now.

Mama Kalila said...

Thanks... I think I really needed to hear that. Thinking back I remember one of the other kids from the cry room acting a bit like this a year or so ago, but right now Kalila's the only one (despite not being the only one her age) and I feel bad about it. I've gotten several dirty looks though and it just makes me feel worse.

Keith said...

Not being all that familiar with the Catholic a cry room like a nursery? We just drop Grayson off every morning (same person always staffing it so he's cool with her) before service. I can't imagine trying to keep him occupied in the sanctuary. Kids that young really can't be expected to stay calm for any length of time.

Our nursery is great also because they do a "service" with them..well, they do age appropriate activities with them (birth-2; we have a separate "children's church" for preschoolers)

Mama Kalila said...

Not exactly no... A cry room is a room set off to the side behind soundproof glass. We get to listen and participate (for the most part lol.. sometimes mikes go out or its too loud in there to hear) and everyone else doesn't hear screaming babies. Not every Parish has one, back home we didn't... but usually the ones w/out them tend not to mind random crying during Mass as much. I know some of the people here don't either, but still.

I'm not expecting Kalila to behave perfectly at her age either... but she can behave better than she does at that particular Mass (I've seen her do it lol).